Are we in a gay sports bar?
Who wears a wallet chain?!
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
