Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
