I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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