doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
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