But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Randomize
