Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
