You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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