I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
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