We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
