He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
