found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
