whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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