So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
