Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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