I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
