There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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