Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
