spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
