How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
