If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
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