I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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