We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Randomize