i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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