btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
