he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
pop tarts are not kleenex
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
