I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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