Why does Corona taste like a burp?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
