I'd wear matching sweaters with you
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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