absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
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