We won't sleep together?
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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