This girl is more easily done than said...
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
