he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
This is my gift to your gina
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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