I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Randomize
