if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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