he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
