The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Randomize
