No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
