isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
My vagina just clenched in fear
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize