How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Randomize
