whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Randomize
