I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
