dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
