He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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