If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
