It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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