i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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