For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
