just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
