I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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