Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Do you still have your period?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
